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  4. how to take as shower

how to take as shower

Scheduled Pinned Locked Moved Run Your Mouth
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  • DaveHD Offline
    DaveHD Offline
    DaveH
    wrote on last edited by
    #1

    Probably only funny to married people, or folks living with their significant other.

    **How To Shower Like a Woman **

    Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
    Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
    Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.
    Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.
    Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins. Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean. Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced.

    Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.
    Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.
    Rinse conditioner off hair.
    Shave armpits and legs.
    Turn off shower.
    Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower. Spray mold spots with Tilex.
    Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country.
    Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
    Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
    If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.

    **How To Shower Like a Man **

    Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.
    Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the 'woo-woo' sound.
    Look at your manly physique in the mirror. Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt.
    Get in the shower. Wash your face. Wash your armpits. Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
    Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.
    Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
    Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
    Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
    Pee.
    Rinse off and get out of shower.
    Partially dry off. Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.
    Admire wiener size in mirror again.
    Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
    Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the 'woo-woo' sound again.

    Throw wet towel on bed.

    DaveH
    '94 Supra- 7.77 @ 176mph

    legacy image

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    0
    • stephen bradleyS Offline
      stephen bradleyS Offline
      stephen bradley
      wrote on last edited by
      #2

      woo woo

      "Support bacteria. They're the only culture some people have."

      • Unknown
      1 Reply Last reply
      0
      • DaveHD Offline
        DaveHD Offline
        DaveH
        wrote on last edited by
        #3

        8====>

        DaveH
        '94 Supra- 7.77 @ 176mph

        legacy image

        1 Reply Last reply
        0
        • 91nbtsi9 Offline
          91nbtsi9 Offline
          91nbtsi
          wrote on last edited by
          #4

          I love it. I have seen it before, but still laugh at the male part. Cuz it is all true, lol.

          [email protected] -- DSM
          07 Mega Cab 5.9 CTD

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          0
          • ? This user is from outside of this forum
            ? This user is from outside of this forum
            Guest
            wrote on last edited by
            #5

            we're supposed to shower?

            I just like making the "woo-woo" sound at my wife

            1 Reply Last reply
            0
            • NickBN Offline
              NickBN Offline
              NickB
              wrote on last edited by
              #6

              probably why she doesn't put out...


              1 Reply Last reply
              0
              • ? This user is from outside of this forum
                ? This user is from outside of this forum
                Guest
                wrote on last edited by
                #7

                I dunno...I managed to do good enough to get married twice in my life, I must be doing something right (or wrong, depending on your perspective of marriage)

                1 Reply Last reply
                0
                • ? This user is from outside of this forum
                  ? This user is from outside of this forum
                  Guest
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #8

                  Well im not married (and thank god) but its still very funny.

                  1 Reply Last reply
                  0
                  • ? This user is from outside of this forum
                    ? This user is from outside of this forum
                    Guest
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #9

                    I hate it when the shower curtain is outside the tub and the floor gets wet.. I've almost slipped numerous times...

                    1 Reply Last reply
                    0
                    • My NOvaM Offline
                      My NOvaM Offline
                      My NOva
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #10

                      Rofl

                      Hey Tina come get some hamm

                      1 Reply Last reply
                      0
                      • RaiderR Offline
                        RaiderR Offline
                        Raider
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #11

                        DaveH wrote:
                        Probably only funny to married people, or folks living with their significant other.

                        **How To Shower Like a Woman **

                        Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
                        Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
                        Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.
                        Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.
                        Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins. Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean. Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced.

                        Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.
                        Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.
                        Rinse conditioner off hair.
                        Shave armpits and legs.
                        Turn off shower.
                        Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower. Spray mold spots with Tilex.
                        Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country.
                        Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
                        Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
                        If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.

                        **How To Shower Like a Man **

                        Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.
                        Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the 'woo-woo' sound.
                        Look at your manly physique in the mirror. Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt.
                        Get in the shower. Wash your face. Wash your armpits. Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
                        Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.
                        Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
                        Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
                        Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
                        Pee.
                        Rinse off and get out of shower.
                        Partially dry off. Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.
                        Admire wiener size in mirror again.
                        Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
                        Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the 'woo-woo' sound again.

                        Throw wet towel on bed.

                        so Dave is this what happens at your house?

                        POWERD BY

                        legacy image

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                        0
                        • TwistedAngelT Offline
                          TwistedAngelT Offline
                          TwistedAngel
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #12

                          I'm not sure if the female part is right, but the male part definately is! Maybe the older women go about their showers like that, but not I. And I think EVERY guy does the whole shakin' the wiener sayin' woo hoo thing. LOL!

                          1 Reply Last reply
                          0
                          • King RicerK Offline
                            King RicerK Offline
                            King Ricer
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #13

                            that's really funny

                            > Trafik Jamz;299122 wrote:
                            > But Freitag is a slut....everyone knows this!

                            1 Reply Last reply
                            0
                            • O Offline
                              O Offline
                              out there
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #14

                              CivGirl wrote:
                              I'm not sure if the female part is right, but the male part definately is! Maybe the older women go about their showers like that, but not I. And I think EVERY guy does the whole shakin' the wiener sayin' woo hoo thing. LOL!

                              i sort of agree... my gf wanders around the bedroom and bathroom naked. i just shower and get on with what i had planned, none of this wiener shaking, "woo woo"-ing

                              1 Reply Last reply
                              0
                              • ? This user is from outside of this forum
                                ? This user is from outside of this forum
                                Guest
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #15

                                you're missing out on the better parts of life not doing that....LOL

                                1 Reply Last reply
                                0
                                • PhatsP Offline
                                  PhatsP Offline
                                  Phats
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #16

                                  i for one woo-woo all the time, in fact i look for excuses to woo-woo all the time.

                                  02 GSXR-1000
                                  97 540i

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                                  0
                                  • ? This user is from outside of this forum
                                    ? This user is from outside of this forum
                                    Guest
                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #17

                                    Definite pee-er in the shower I am.:)

                                    1 Reply Last reply
                                    0
                                    • B Offline
                                      B Offline
                                      bestoneyet
                                      wrote on last edited by
                                      #18

                                      I dont really think the female one is right. I dont shower like that ever. But the guy one is very true.

                                      1 Reply Last reply
                                      0
                                      • grumblecakesG Offline
                                        grumblecakesG Offline
                                        grumblecakes
                                        wrote on last edited by
                                        #19

                                        Anyone who says they don’t pee in the shower is lying

                                        VTec, All the lag without the boost, it's like waiting for bad sex

                                        1 Reply Last reply
                                        0
                                        • hondagirl17H Offline
                                          hondagirl17H Offline
                                          hondagirl17
                                          wrote on last edited by
                                          #20

                                          heh... the girl part is somewhat close, but not really! I've seen that before too.. it is pretty good!

                                          legacy image

                                          ~ Laura
                                          5th Generation Prelude (silver)
                                          All stock....for now!

                                          01 GSX-R600
                                          ~ :cool:

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